When You're Gone
by Swarek-Malfoy
Summary: A pregnant Lulu remembers some happy moments of her life with Logan as she waits for him to return from Iraq...Lugan


_**I always needed time on my own  
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry**_

Lulu sat on the porch swing, wishing he was there by her side, and wishing she knew that he was alright. She felt the tears build up in her eyes, when she wondered if he was alive. She knew he knew the dangers when he enlisted, she begged him not to go, but he felt defending his country was something he had to do. He's been in Iraq for two long months. She still found it hard to believe that he's been gone that long.

_**And the days feel like years when I'm alone  
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side**_

She woke up hoping it was all a dream and that he would be lying beside her in their bed, but sadly it wasn't, he was still in Iraq. The days turned into weeks which turned into months, it's been four months now and she was starting to show. She found out she was pregnant a few weeks before he left. He was ecstatic; to learn he was going to be a father, she remembered it as if it were yesterday…

_Lulu sat on the couch, waiting for him to walk through the door. She wondered how he would take the news. The hours passed by and she had long since fell asleep. Logan had arrived home a short time ago, but he didn't want to wake her. He sat down quietly, careful not to wake her. She soon switched sides and curled up against him. He smiled as he watched his wife still sleeping soundly; he soon drifted off to sleep as well._

A few hours later she awoke to see that Logan had arrived home.

"Logan" she whispered

He smiled and opened his eyes

"Why didn't you wake me?" she asked

"You looked so peaceful that I just couldn't" he smiled and she smiled back.

She looked down at her stomach and wondered how she could tell him.

"Um Logan? There's something that I have to tell you" She said quietly

"What is it sweetheart?" he asked

She hesitated a bit "I'm…uh…I'm pregnant" she said

She wasn't sure what his response would be.

"Really?" Logan said

Lulu looked up at him, and was glad when she saw that he was smiling at her with a twinkle in his eye.

"Lulu that's wonderful" he said excitedly

She let out a breath that she didn't know she was holding.

Logan kind of chuckled "Were you scared about what I'd think?" he asked

"Yeah, kind of" she said

"You should know Lu that I love you and of course I'd love our child" he smiled

"I know" she said "But, you have to leave soon and…"

"Lulu, I'm coming back" he said reassuringly "I'll always come back to you, my love for you and our child will keep me safe, I promise"

Lulu smiled at the memory and hoped he was right that his love for her and their baby will keep him safe.

_**When you walk away I count the steps that you take  
Do you see how much I need you right now?**_

It's been six very long months since she last saw his face. She remembered the day that he left…

_Lulu lay in his arms, wishing he didn't have to go. But the truth is, he had to, he was being deployed to serve in Iraq. He was set to leave in the morning. She looked up and saw he was sleeping peacefully, she smiled sadly worrying that this might be the last time she was with him, the last time she was happy with the love of her life. That night she prayed, she prayed that he would return home to her safely._

Lulu woke up the next morning still wrapped in Logan's arms. She could feel the tears dripping down her cheeks. She knew this was the day that she would have to say goodbye.

"Sweetheart, don't cry" he said

"I'm sorry" she said through her tears "I just…I can't help it"

"I love you sweetie" he said kissing her lightly on the lips "I promise I'll come back to you both"

They both grudgingly got out of bed. In a few short hours, the bus would come to take him away.

The time flew by quickly. They both sat on the porch swing, waiting for his bus to come; he was packed and had his uniform on. Logan wanted to lighten the mood; he didn't want her to worry.

"Lu, so do you have any names yet?" he asked

"I'm not sure" she said "I was thinking…maybe for a boy, what do you think of Jeffrey?"

"I think it's perfect" he smiled as he leaned in to kiss her

"Do you have any ideas for a girl?" she asked

"Hmmm…what about, Cheyanne?" he said

Lulu smiled

"I love it" she replied

Logan hugged her close, not wanting to ever let her go. But sadly, the bus rounded the corner, it was time to say goodbye.

Lulu followed Logan down the steps. She hugged him tightly, and wanted him to promise one thing.

"Promise me that you'll come back to me" she said through her tears

"I promise sweetheart" he said before he kissed her passionately

Logan put his hand on her stomach "I love you both" he said with a smile

"I love you too, so much" she said

It was time to go and Logan stepped on the bus. He turned back and smirked at Lulu, the same smirk that still made her weak in the knees, before the bus closed its doors and drove away.

_**When you're gone  
The pieces of my heart are missing you  
When you're gone  
The face I came to know is missing too  
And when you're gone  
The words I need to hear  
To always get me through the day and  
make it okay  
I miss you**_

It was time, Lulu could feel it, god how she wished Logan was there to see the birth of their child. She was having lunch with Lucky when it happened, so he took her to the hospital.

They walked out the elevator doors and Lulu bent down in pain.

"It'll all be alright Lulu" he said trying to comfort his sister

A nurse brought a wheel chair over and Lucky helped Lulu in it.

"I wish Logan was here" she cried

"I know" Lucky said, his heart broke for her "Lulu everything will be alright, he'll be back before you know it"

The nurse wheeled Lulu to the delivery room.

Lucky waited in the room they had set up for Lulu. Time dragged on, the minutes felt like hours. He stood up when he saw the nurse come in with Lulu. Lucky helped her up on the bed.

"Where's my baby?" she asked quietly

"She's right here" Emily said as she brought Lulu's infant daughter in and set her in Lulu's arms.

"She's beautiful, Lu" Lucky smiled

Lulu started to tear up as she looked down at the little girl and smiled

"Do you have any names yet?" Emily asked

Lulu looked up and smiled and nodded "Cheyanne Jacqueline Hayes"

"Oh Lulu, that's beautiful" Emily said

"Logan picked it out before he left" she smiled

She sure wished Logan was with her now.

_**I've never felt this way before  
Everything that I do reminds me of you  
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor  
And they smell just like you  
I love the things that you do**_

It's been a full year since Logan left for Iraq, and their daughter was 3 months old, she had blond hair like her mother and pale green eyes like her father. Lulu held her in her arms as she rocked on the porch swing. She had a dream last night that she was sitting in that very spot with Logan by her side holding Cheyanne. Lulu saw that she was asleep so she brought her b inside and lied her down in her crib.

She then walked into her room. She left it the same as it was before he left. She felt a tear slide down her cheek, thinking about how much she missed her husband. She went over to the closet and took out one of his shirts and went to lie down on the bed. She cuddled up to the shirt, it still smelled like him.

_**When you walk away I count the steps that you take  
Do you see how much I need you right now?**_

A year later, Lulu sat at the church crying. Lucky held her close to him.

A man stood up and spoke.

"May we please bow our heads, as list is read of those brave men who lost their lives fighting for our country"

Lulu prayed and prayed that Logan wasn't one of those men who were gone.

Logan's name was not read.

_**When you're gone  
The pieces of my heart are missing you  
When you're gone  
The face I came to know is missing too  
And when you're gone  
The words I need to hear  
To always get me through the day and  
make it okay  
I miss you**_

Lucky and Lulu exited the church. Lulu was still worried.

"Lulu, he'll come back, he promised right?"

Lulu nodded her head and wiped the tears from her eyes. Her phone buzzed in her pocket. She took it out and read the message.

_I'm ok sweetheart  
I love you with all my heart_

Lulu smiled big and cried, but this time they were happy tears.

"Lulu, what is it?" Lucky asked

Lulu smiled "Logan, he's ok" she said and showed Lucky the message.

_**We were made for each other  
Out here forever  
I know we were, yeah yeahhh  
All I ever wanted was for you to know  
Everything I do, I give my heart and soul  
I can hardly breathe  
I need to feel you here with me, yeah**_

Lulu sat on the porch swing and her one year old daughter sat at her side. It was her favorite place to sit.

"Daddy's ok sweetie" she said kissing the top of Cheyanne's head "He's coming home, just like he promised"

Lulu's phone buzzed with a message

_I never break my promises_

Lulu looked and saw Logan come around the corner of the house.

"Logan" she screamed

She jumped up with her daughter in her arms. She ran down the steps and Logan hugged them both close.

_**When you're gone  
The pieces of my heart are missing you  
When you're gone the face I came  
to know is missing too**_

"I can't believe you're here" Lulu smiled big and kissed him passionately

"Believe it sweetheart" he said with his signature smirk

Logan looked at the beautiful little girl in Lulu's arms.

"Logan would you like to meet your daughter" Lulu smiled as Logan held his daughter for the first time.

"She's beautiful" Logan said and his eyes twinkled with joy.

"I named her Cheyanne like you said" Lulu smiled "Her middle name is Jacqueline"

Logan smiled that Lulu named their daughter after his mother.

"I love you Lulu, so much" Logan said

"I love you to" she said "Come on, lets go inside"

Logan looked at his daughter and smiled "So what do ya say baby girl?"

Logan held Cheyanne in one arm as he wrapped the other arm around Lulu and they made their way into the house.

_**And when you're gone  
The words I need to hear  
will always get me through the day  
and make it okay  
I miss you**_

A few days later, Lulu arrived home from getting groceries. She looked through the house for Logan and found him sleeping on their bed with little Cheyanne lying on his chest, sleeping as well. Lulu smiled and crawled into bed next to them. Logan opened his eyes and smiled at Lulu and she curled up to his side. She was so glad he was home and he was so glad to be home. They missed each other terribly. But now they were happy…the three of them.

_the end_


End file.
